Sunday, August 31, 2008

Tears

The things that trickle down my cheeks quite often now a days. Strange thing is, is that a lot of the time I'm not sure why.

Its been an incredibly hard couple of weeks for me. With my surgery I've had to give up a lot of independence, which is really hard. I mean I can barely make myself a meal or carry things around. It's so hard. The harder part is everyone starts to get annoyed. It would have been fine if it was only a little while, but after 3 weeks, with another 3 to come, people just stop. Or at least they want to stop. They stop wanting to do things and help out. Rude comments begin, nasty looks pierce, and worst of all, all that annoyance turns into greater, harsher feelings that emerge on a daily basis.

Sorry for all the complaining, but this is the only way to get it all out it seems. Those who choose to read it will, otherwise its just written words that help me cope.

It just hurts to know even my family is annoyed. Trust me, if I had just one wish right now it would be to be able to walk again. To stop this, and to have people just enjoy being around me not wondering what else I'm going to ask for, or what other "favor" is coming at them. I just want to feel, and be treated, normal again. That's all I want right now.

In a way I'm really looking forward to going back to school. It gets me out of my house and away from a potentially bad situation. Also, it relieves my family of taking care of me for a few hours. Put me in a situation where people will probably just feel more sorry for me. Ugh, that's going to be hell.

Anyway, away from that topic......What else is there?
Well, lets see, right now I'm talking about party, boys, you know, regular girl stuff, haha. It's great fun. Oh we also found something we decided to call a vodkamelon. It sounds quiet interesting.

Well I've run out of things to say.

<3>

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

VODKAMELONS ARE DELICIOUS!