When life happens, it happens all at once

Why is it that whenever life seems to happen it always comes fast and furious? I mean, I'm never ready whenever life decides it wants to get very....interesting?

Let's see, right now I am so confused about all of my emotions. I've said all this stuff about not needing to like someone and having no time, and all this, yet I find myself always thinking about it again.

Okay, so lets just say there's one person and I think I might have feelings for them, but there's no way I can tell people. I mean, I see them and I smile, they sign in and I smile, I think about them and I smile. Yet I can't bring myself to do anything about it. It wouldn't be fair to them I don't think. I just don't think they would be willing to go through that again. I guess they are just so caring, so friendly, so helpful, so great, but is it for me or for someone else? I guess this is what I have to figure out.

Then there's the other person. Now I know I don't like this person more than a friend, but I think they think I do and it could be bad. I mean, we're friends, we talk, that's all good, but we don't hang out too often. Now all of a sudden he wants to hang out and is really flirty and I don't know what to do. It's a little stressful. I have to think about everything I say in order to not lead it anywhere, and I have to be careful of what I do. It makes for a complicated situation.

And there's always the time factor. Do I even have time to pursue a relationship? Would it fit into the classes, work, physio, shows, homework, basketball, family, and friends? Does other person have the time?

I wish times were simpler, back when our greatest worry was how much the tooth fairy would give us, or if Santa would still come if I ate that extra cookie when I was told not to.

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